Monday, June 16, 2008

A Reality Check

A few days ago, I observed a mediation. Two parents struggling to raise a child and now resorting to mediators to help them devise a co-parenting plan that works for them.

Well, what can I say? It was interesting no doubt and I came home feeling blessed. Blessed for the life I have.

There have been many opportunities in the past that have helped me realize this but the feeling I got while I sat in the periphery watching two parents squabble over their 5 year old is something that is indescribable. I almost choked at several instances during the conversation. I didn’t know who I should pick sides with-not that I had to. Both mom and father seemed reasonable about what needs to be done but because of their checkered pasts, mistakes and a few bad decisions, they were struggling. Their relationship as a couple is beyond repair and although some aspects of that did come out during the discussion, the mediators did an awesome job in maintaining the focus on the child.

My heart went out to the child who is caught in all of this. He is only 5 years old and already has had a difficult life. Will life ever get sorted out for him? Although his parents have agreed to seek help and counsel, will they stick to their commitments? Who knows? I hope they do. Else why bring a child into this world? A question I often ask nowadays when I read about abused or neglected kids. Unfortunately, there are quite a few people in this world who don’t take responsibility of their actions and ultimately it is the child who suffers.

Although I came back home disturbed, I had this renewed sense of appreciation for my little ones- for what they provide to us and how fortunate we are to have them. It also made me evaluate our roles and what we have done so far as parents and I must admit, for a fleeting moment, I was proud of us. Pleased about how we are managing so far albeit challenges. And these challenges will always be there. But no matter, how big or high they are, it is about learning from our mistakes and consciously making an effort to better ourselves, as parents, as individuals, as purposeful people.

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