Friday, November 2, 2007

Alone time

Hubby dear and I are going on a date tonight. After almost 100 years! No, actually a year and half to be precise, but it feels like 100. It is about time we start focusing on us, our relationship and our needs. It is about time we revive and recapture some of the love and of course the romance. We have been so caught up having kids and raising them, that we have almost stopped paying attention to one another. Not a good thing at all. I can see relationship experts shaking their heads in dismay! What, you haven’t spent any adult time together…how have you managed to keep your marriage intact?

Well, to be honest, it wasn’t hard as we both realized that our priorities have significantly changed with two little ones entering our lives. It cannot be about us always. We now have two additional beings to take care of; to nurture and provide. They are the two most important aspects of our lives. They are the 10’s on a 1-10 rating scale, 10 being the highest. At some point you realize that it is all about them and will probably remain so for the rest of our lives.

Now do I miss the twosome dinners and drives we went on? Yes, I do. Do I miss watching movies sitting cozily in each other’s arms? Yes, definitely. Do I miss just sitting on the couch, conversing with hubby dear without any kids shouting or screaming? Yes, of course! But these sacrifices are all worthwhile. Nothing brings us more pleasure than being with our kids. In fact, there have been a few occasions in the distant past when we had left D with his grandparents while we sneaked out to watch a movie or binge on sushi. It was fun no doubt and afforded us the much needed breather but guess what, we also felt incomplete with his absence. No matter how chaotic or painful they make family outings with their tantrums, whining and us having to constantly keep an eye on them, it truly is a incredible feeling to have them with us and spend the time together.

OK, now getting back to our date. Although we enjoy being with the kids, we are also ready to spend some time alone. Hence tonight, we plan to go and have dinner at this really nice Mediterranean place and then catch a movie (don’t ask me when was the last time we saw a movie in a theater- maybe in our last life!). I know it will feel kinda weird not to have them with us and I am pretty certain we will end up talking about them while we savor lamb chops and herbed couscous but we both are excited about it.

And I am certain that this ‘getaway’ will make us want to spend more time with them, would make us realize even more how preciously significant they are and how much they complete our lives.

1 comment:

Anamika said...

Hi, followed your comment and got to your blog. Thanks for dropping by and commenting.

This was a nice piece. You are so right! Though I am looking forward to having my own kids someday I can't imagine losing this phase of absolute 'alone togetherness'. But, like you said, I guess once babies come they make a place in your life that you didn't know you had! And things are never the same again - in a good way!